there's no such thing as a bad decision, every decision made is always the best one given the conditions at that point in time.
i only ever said this statement to 2 persons, mew and cla. and mew is the only one who could understand conceptually what i meant by this sentence.
a decision can only be good or bad in retrospect, depending on how far it is from the expected outcomes. when the outcome is very near to what is desired, there is a good decision. when the outcome is very far to what is desired, there is a bad decision. but by that time when we know the outcome, that decision is already a thing of the past, existing only as a mental object.
at the specific point in time when a decision is required, there will be a weighing of conditions. conditions arising from the environment (form arising from the 5 senses), conditions arising from our feelings, conditions arising from similar past experiences (volition), we will form a perception of the situation and come to a decision.
to have a better grasp of this, think back to a time when a supposed bad decision was made. chances are there could be alternative options open to us, yet we have decided thus for whatever reasons. those reasons will surely involve any of the conditions stated above.
what has this got to do with anything at all?
living in a world with thoughts of bad decisions have a negative impact. it deflates confidence, it causes self blame unnecessarily, it distracts us from looking at the outcome and working on it. please do not misunderstand this as a way of shunning responsibilities. it is not. in fact it is taking up responsibility by understanding the nature of decisions and continuously working on outcomes.
maybe if we can see it closer, all these conditions are arised automatically, with each of them both a cause as well as an effect that is changing dynamically every moment of our lives.
if ever mew has a chance to read this, hope she can see beyond the surface level, and come to terms and see beyond the self.
wish her a good life, with metta.